A DNA test upended my family. Do I side with my grandmother — or her secret child?
A DNA test revealed a family secret involving the author's grandmother, who had a child out of wedlock and gave them up for adoption. The author grapples with the moral dilemma of respecting their grandmother's wishes while also acknowledging the needs of the newfound relative seeking answers. This situation highlights the complexities of family dynamics and the impact of modern technology on personal histories.
- ▪The author's grandmother had a teenage pregnancy that she kept secret and gave the child up for adoption.
- ▪The author discovered this secret after receiving a message from a relative on an ancestry DNA website.
- ▪The grandmother is horrified by the revelation and wants nothing to do with her biological child.
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Future PerfectA DNA test upended my family. Do I side with my grandmother — or her secret child?I don’t know what I owe my newfound relative.by Sigal SamuelUpdated May 31, 2026, 12:00 PM UTCShareGiftPete Gamlen for VoxPart OfNeed a Distraction?see all updates Sigal Samuel is a correspondent for Vox’s Future Perfect. She writes primarily about the future of consciousness, tracking advances in artificial intelligence and neuroscience and their staggering ethical implications. Before joining Vox, Sigal was the religion editor at the Atlantic.Editor’s note, May 31, 8 am ET: We’re bringing you some of our best-loved Your Mileage May Vary columns while Sigal Samuel is on parental leave. The one below originally published on October 6, 2024.
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